oy vey…tonight, of course, the subject was dad’s death and all the surrounding hoopla involved in saying goodbye. I am still numb and all I could think was ‘mom is going too, soon’ and I’ll still be numb. This numbness can’t possibly last forever…then what? Right now I have bereavement leave from work but if mommy goes before the end of summer, I am so screwed in the time off department. Parents are not supposed to do this…die so freakin’ close together. What is wrong with this picture? I cannot STAND it! Will it ever get easier? I wish I didn’t care. Tears are close, finally…Amazing Race is on soon, thank god for distraction. I love this show…go figure. Isn’t it weird when a gazillion thoughts try to come out all at the same time? I better go…Peace.


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