a drunk walks into a bar

and says “OUCH!”
Ok, so I needed the giggle. (!)

I took my mother out to lunch today.
Yes, I’m serious.

I went to the funeral home and picked her ashes up. I cried. To imagine a person…an entire body…could have anything done to them that would make them fit in a box that small…un-fucking-believable.

So, anyway, I go out to the car, set the box on the front seat and think “I wish I could have lunch with my mom just one more time.” Then I think “Well, why can’t I? She’s right here.” Next thing I know, I am at the restaurant where she always had lunch after her doctor’s appointments.

I took myself and the box into the restaurant, sat down at a table, put the box ON the table and ordered the same thing I ate the last time I went there with her…and then I ordered something she’d had the last time we were there too!

To say I was full when I was done is an understatement BUT it was good…and I’m glad I did it.

I’m not sure the word “closure” can ever apply to this experience however I am determined to go with what works and feels right at any given time during the process.

Today it felt right to have lunch with my mom.



8 responses to this post.

  1. OMG…that is so wonderful, and so sweet, and it sounds like you got just what you needed for yesterday.

    The fact that you hugged me just for having a little body image blues last night blows me away.



  2. I’m so very very happy you were able to have lunch with her just one more time. What a lovely tribute.



  3. I LOVELOVELOVE that you went to lunch with your mom. The next time you do, you don’t have to take her ashes with you. That’s not her anymore anyway. Her spirit is with you always. Just talk to her and see how it feels.

    All good thoughts and prayers to you, my friend.


  4. Hunny-bunny, I love your impulse to take her to lunch, and I LOVE that you acted on it and siezed the day! I’m willing you all the strength and peace I can muster for this weekend. But it looks like you’ll have a surplus…



  5. That is so great that it felt “right”. I love when those moments arrive.



  6. Sometimes we doubt but our “instincts” our spirit, always lead us to our best path, doesn’t it?

    Loving you,


  7. OY VEY-All I can say your luncheon
    would be “Sarah approved”

    Shalom and we love you



  8. If it felt like the right thing to do, then I’m really glad you went ahead and did it. I’m sure she was smiling down on you the whole time!


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