It turns out I am really struggling with anger. This week it presents as irritability. I think I’ve told my daughters (and husband) several times during the past several days that they are not doing anything wrong, it’s simply part of the grief process. My girlies get it. My husband does not. I swear, if he asks me ‘what’s wrong?’ one more time I will need to be held back from ripping his head off. I keep thinking ‘what kind of a question is that?’ and ‘why are you asking such stupidity?’ I really, really, really would like to be done now. *sigh*


11 responses to this post.

  1. Anger, grief, sadness, relief. Reverse. Start over. Rotate around. Begin again. Over and over. I know it is all part of the process. I know. I know. I know. But knowing doesn’t always make it easier.

    I love you.

    Sending you the warmest and knowing hugs,



  2. My beloved is that way, too. He wants to identify the problem and fix it. Simple, right?? WRONG! My dad died almost two years ago and it still makes me weep from time to time. He wants to help, but somehow the constant, “What’s wrong, Sweetheart?” does nothing for me.

    Inhale, exhale… repeat. I’m doing a lot of that lately. I recommend it.


  3. *hug* Hopefully he’ll get it eventually.


  4. Irritability is a very big part of grief and recovery. Give yourself room and persmission for it all.



  5. You’re allowed to be angry. You’re allowed to be sad. You’re allowed to feel any of the feelings of pain or sadness, joy or love that you are and will be feeling. It’s not only allowed.. it’s normal and beneficial. Don’t let others dictate how you grieve and keep taking care of yourself my friend.



  6. I always got so angry with the question “what’s wrong?” I wanted to scream “MY FATHER IS DEAD YOU IDIOT! THAT’S WHAT’S FUCKING WRONG!” While I don’t recommend that particular response to the hubby, it is okay to write it here and shout it into your pillow as often as you would like.


  7. I’m sending a big hug to you, and a boot to the head to your hub.

    The stages of grief take as long as they take. Don’t allow yourself to feel rushed because someone might not understand. We all grieve differently, and you need to truly feel each emotion, so you can deal with it and move on.

    My prayers are with you, my friend.


  8. It’s all part of the process, just allowing yourself to feel what you feel. It’s hard to embrace difficult emotions sometimes.


  9. it sucks doesn’t it ? To realize that the stages aren’t ordered nice a tidy.
    That you may well have to experience each one at any given time.
    I feel for you deeply.
    I’m glad at least that some family members get it and maybe they can help your hubby to understand before you kill him !


  10. Hang in there. Men operate on different cylinders. 🙂 Renee


  11. Wow…how timely was this post for me? I’m in the anger phase at the moment too. 😐 I just dropped by to let you know I’ve added you to my blog roll…been reading for a while but I rarely know what to say.



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