father’s day

“He has a new family.  Let them talk to him!” 

Those words came out of daughter #2’s mouth last night at dinner when the question was asked “Have you called your dad today?”  Daughter #3 looked confused and upset at both the question and the reply.  I felt my heart break a bit more for my beautiful girls.  😦

I wish I could “fix” this for my children.  I wish I could pull out a beautifully simple magic wand and wave all their cares away…give them a “perfect” father and the knowledge they are loved to distraction by him.  Of course, I cannot.  Knowing that doesn’t change my dream.  I would very much like to be able to replace all the bad memories and abandonment issues with beautiful and special times.  If I could give my daughters anything, it would be peaceful memories. 

Daughter #2 wants to do a semester of foreign exchange.  It costs a freaking fortune and I have told her there is absolutely no way I can pay for it.  I have made suggestions for fund raising etc however I don’t know how she is going to raise 10 thousand dollars in the short amount of time available.  She wants so badly to get out of this country for an adventure.  She is afraid that if she waits for college, it will never happen.  She doesn’t want to say in “our town” for her whole life.  She wants MORE than she’s got and most definitely more than I can provide.  She is upset that she is 16 and has never “been anywhere”.  *sigh*

Daughter #1 has arrived home for the summer from college.  She cried when we left the campus.  *bigger sigh*  So far it’s going alright and she does have work for the summer!  I’m sure by the time it’s September we will all want her to GO!  I am also sure it won’t take her that long to want to LEAVE!  LOL

I have lots to write about…it’s all rolling around in my head…the words will materialize soon I’m sure.  Peace.


3 responses to this post.

  1. Wishing you peace too.
    I will update my links.


  2. Hi Sweetie! Sorry we didn’t connect last week, but glad your girlies are all under your roof for a few weeks. It is natural for adolescents to wish for grand adventure, even when they have it. Maybe she’d like to work in a travel agency for the summer, and she can get all those exotic travel posters and put them up all over her room, and learn about places she’d like to go when she’s saved up enough money to travel — perhaps during a summer break from college! And then, she wouldn’t be hindered in her quest for adventure by having to attend school in a foreign land.


  3. Hugs… Having a father isn’t nearly as important as having a GOOD father 😦

    Hope your ex learns that lesson soon and steps up.


  4. Posted by scribbleandscribe on Sunday, June 25, 2006 at 4:04 pm

    I agree with Julie, I ached every time my kids dad
    let them down. I still do.
    I lied for him too many time.
    The kids know now and that hurts just as much.
    beautiful heartflet post.


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